Trusted Advisor Blog

The approach of Valentine’s Day serves as an ideal reminder not only for our personal situations, but also allows business leaders, entrepreneurs, educators, students and families to take some time to reflect on the differences of solitude and quiet in comparison to camaraderie and sharing and the benefits and drawbacks of each.

In all aspects we must balance time alone with the new universal move toward group think-tanks and the vast online connectivity of a world socially linked. Just as there is value in teams and partnerships, we often underestimate the worth in time alone and the stillness of our own thoughts and ideas. Both offer opportunities to appreciate varying perspectives we may not otherwise experience.

Rather than label yourself as an extrovert or introvert and yield to the traits as characterized, realize that as humans we are wired and nurtured (nature AND nurture) to lean more towards one than the other, but neither needs to regarded as negative or positive and both can be advantageous in our business, education and personal lives. There is a symbiotic relationship of both, not only WITHIN us, but also in our workplace, in our schools and in our world.

From Facebook and YouTube to open office spaces, group think-tanks, conference call meetings, networking events and collaborative projects, virtually all students, employees, singles and families at some point in time are expected to be part of a TEAM. The key is understanding the differences of both personalities and allowing them to exist and prosper by respecting each members needs rather than forcing them to conform to one way of thinking.

Allow friends who are clearly more driven by an introverted nature the space and time to be alone without passing judgment or forcing them to become more outgoing. Similarly, If you’re in a business partnership at an event where your colleague is gregarious and stays at events to network when you prefer to be return to the office, allow him the space to express himself and do not let it impact your businessd decisions.

As a parent, realize the strengths in your child rather than trying to make a quiet, studious academic into a lead in the school play. Respect varying personalities among family members and their innate desires to express them.  Bring out the best in each child or your partners rather than comparing and critiquing what you see as a weakness.

Create space within your office, your classroom, your family and your life to allow for different personalities, varying methods of communicating and unique learning styles. When you allow differences you leave space to coexist and grow in a creative environment.

Some people are more innovative when they are alone; others work best with a partner or as a member of a group. Regardless of personality style, we must be open to both. It is collaboration with an individualistic understanding.

“I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people: that each protects the solitude of the other”. -Rainer Maria Rilke